Not Catching Love by Saxon James

Not Catching Love by Saxon James
Accidental Love #5
Release Date: January 30, 2025
Cover Design: Story Styling Cover Designs
Photo: Michelle Lancaster
Model: Andy

Why you will love Not Catching Love:
❤️M/M Romance
🩷Nurse x Artist
🧡friends to lovers
💛hurt/comfort
💚forbidden romance
💙slow burn
💜it’s about time
🩵found family

ABOUT THE BOOK:

Xander

There’s something seriously wrong with me.

For once, I’m not talking about the health anxiety that randomly pops up and wreaks havoc on my life. I’m talking about, well, everything else.

All my roommates have found someone to love them, and it hurts to see the guys who used to have me at the center of their worlds pair off and grow up, especially when it’s a reminder of how alone I’ve always been. I’ve always had an issue with relationships. With forming a connection with people outside of Seven, but this is more.

Because I want to find my someone.

Except the one person my brain has latched onto is the one person I can never have. The one person who’s there to help me when my panic attacks get too much.

Nurse Derek.

Derek

I should never have offered to treat Xander Moore.

And now here I am years later, my life on hold, while I wait day in and day out for the call that Xander needs me. It always comes, and I always answer, but I’m starting to dread those visits.

Lately, I’m looking at Xander in a way a medical professional should never look at their patient.

When Xander starts volunteering at the same nursing home that I do, I get to see a new side of him. The artistic, charismatic side that draws the residents in. I get glimpses of a man who’s so much more than his anxiety, and it does nothing to help my feelings for him.

Lines begin to blur and I have no choice but to stop treating him. That at least allows us to be friends. The only problem is, being friends isn’t enough for either of us.

It’s wrong, unethical, and unprofessional, but my heart won’t listen. It’s decided on Xander, and it doesn’t want to wait. Neither does Xander.

But if I want to keep my job, I have to resist.

I just wish he didn’t make that so difficult.

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I take his hands. “What are we doing?”

“Twist our swings together, then when we let go, we’ll go flying.”

“That sounds dangerous.”

“Okay, grandpa.”

Fuck it. I’d wanted to be more fun and remember that age is only a number and here’s Xander helping me find that side of myself again. “Let’s go.”

We twist our swings together around and around and around, until the tension on the old chains gets so tight, I’m sure they’re going to snap. My feet barely reach the ground, and Xander’s definitely don’t. Our knees are crushed between each others’. Xander’s so close, he could lean in and bump our noses together.

“I’m ninety percent sure one of us is going to hurt ourselves,” I say.

He lifts a slight shoulder. “I’m not scared. I don’t think I’ve stopped hurting a day in my life.”

“That’s … Xander …”

His eyes are purple again. I haven’t seen the gray since the day I got home, and he watches me for a long moment. “It’s always so weird seeing people react to the things I say.”

“Why?”

“Because it means nothing to me. I don’t feel it. I don’t connect with it. But you do. That’s … so weird.”

“It’s called empathy.”

“I don’t know if I have that,” he whispers. “I know I’m supposed to.”

There he goes underestimating himself again. “How would you feel if Molly was sad?”

“Angry. I’d want to fix it.”

“Because you care about him.”

Xander nods. “Sometimes more than Seven.”

That’s surprising. “I thought Seven was everything to you.”

“He is. But Seven can look after himself. Molly’s … precious. Too breakable.”

“Molly seems like a very capable man, not that I know him well.”

Xander thinks for a long moment. “They’re mine, you know. Both of them.”

“I know.”

“And if anything happens between … I know I joke, but, like, us or … whoever. If I ever find someone who doesn’t get sick of me one day, they’ll be his as well.”

It’s like a knife to my fucking chest every time he says things like that. Sick of him? No one can get sick of Xander. I’ve seen the way his friends love him. The way the residents love him. How much Seven and Molly care. And I know how I feel about him as well.

My fingers find his cheek and fuck me it’s so soft. His eyes drift closed and my heart is beating out of my chest.

“Xander, I—”

Xander’s eyes snap open. “Now!” He lets go and flings away from me. The chains untangle in an aggressive twist that shoots me one way and yanks me the other. I nearly lose it backward off the seat and when I’m finally sure it’s stopped trying to murder me, I suck down a breath and look over at him.

Xander’s whole face is flushed bright.

“Never again.”

He cracks up laughing as I’m still trying to orient myself.

I’m never going to survive him.

Not Catching Love by Saxon James
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Xander, crippled by his fears, fear of living, fear of dying, fear of people he loves dying, and fear that he’d always be alone even with the people that love him unconditionally. Derek is a nurse treating Xander for his crippling panic attacks. He’s developed and interest in the damaged man even though it clashes with his ethics. He want to do the right thing but Xander is just so tempting, even with all his issues.

I didn’t really care for Xander in the previous books so I went into this book kind of indifferent to him. I pretty much saw him as spoiled and manipulative. Derek hadn’t made much of an impact either. It took me a while to warm up to them. Xander’s deep seated problems were truly heartbreaking. I’ve been exposed very slightly to mental illness but wasn’t ready for the depth the author brought to Xander’s issues. I appreciated Derek’s (mostly) self control. I don’t think the story would of had quite the impact if they’d jumped right into a physical relationship. The author gave them their value of individuals before she made them a pair.

This was a difficult story to read. It took some time to digest the beginning, but as I got to know and understand the main characters better the reading became easier. The ending of the book is well worth the perseverance.

Review Copy requested and reviewed on behalf of OMGReads.
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